February 23rd, 2007


[LJ Idol]Wherever you go, there you are...

What do you like best about where you live right now? What do you miss the most about a place you've left behind?

I thought long and hard about this topic. My first instinct was to take this topic and go into depth about the changes from my most recent move. A change from a house, married with kids to my best friend and I in an apartment, separated from my wife and my kids with my mom.

But the more I think about it, the more that seems the wrong route to go.

Because, if you stare at the question, "where you live right now" is more easily the present and "a place you've left behind" is the past.

So the topic boils down to: "What are the joys of your present? What are the lost joys of your past?"

One of the most wonderful things in my life right now are my friends. I have some of the most wonderful friends both on-line and off. And quite often the bridge between the two becomes blurry. While most of my on-line friends, I don't see on a regular basis, I do run into them at cons or talk to them on the phone or even if not, they are people that care about me none the less. I don't know what I would do without you guys, especially on some of the rough times I've gone through over the past couple years. This ties into some of what I miss quite a bit. Lost friends...two of whom, I know I'll never speak to again in this life. Several, that somehow through the winds of fate, contact has been lost. There is no non-family member in my life, that I knew before high school. How many friends have I lost through just the pure fact of being busy in my life.

And then there's my kids. Just thinking about them brings a smile to my face. Whether it's my littlest, trying to use a big word that she doesn't know how to use. Or perhaps my older one, begging me to try and pull a loose tooth out of her head. My time with my kids is quite possibly the most precious time I have right now. They get big so fast. And I know their supposed to, but that I guess, ties into the missed joys of my past. Holding them in my arms, having them grab a finger and hold on for dear life and despite the complaints about noise babies, they sure were a lot more quiet back then. ;)

Looking back at what I miss, makes me think more about thinking about the past, the more I think about it, the more I think that's a dangerous thought. (Wow there's a lot of thinking going on in that sentence.) Its so easy to dwell on what might have been. Or think about what was and want that back. But how does the song go, "I heard a voice inside me say, 'Don't look back, you can never look back.'" The past is an easy trap to fall into. And while it's wonderful to reminisce, don't lose yourself in it, because you still have joys for today and can work for even greater joys for tomorrow. Learn, but don't dwell, because tomorrow is going to be another day.